void
by DramaDelicacy
Summary: – slowly, silently, dying. AU. /sasusaku
1. prologue

**vo**id.

**-noun** ; a feeling or condition of loneliness or deprivation.

* * *

**prologue – **

Slowly, silently;

_Help me… I'm drowning_.

Ignoring all the signs, the gestures, the cold touch. Believing in the empty words and the false promise of forever. _How naïve._

Silently, _loudly_, **crying**.

_Sasuke-kun. Sasuke-kun, I –_

It took all of my courage to confess. It took all of me to take a step.

_Breathe, don't breathe. _Breathe, **don't breathe**.

_Sasuke-kun,_

"Sakura,"

Your voice, confident, trembling, _cold_.

"Sasuke-kun,"

My voice, uncertain, shaking, _scared_.

**I'm drowning**.

That day I took a step.

_Sasuke-kun, I love you._

His eyes, _cold, confused, annoyed_, stared down at me. He walked away without a word. And left me all alone.

Again.

_No one wants you._

**You're unwanted**. _Why were you born?_

"Do you love me?"

"Sakura,"

"Mommy, do you love me?"

"I'm sorry, Sakura."

_Mommy, did you leave me because I wasn't good enough? Don't go. Come back._

**_Please_**, come back.

* * *

A week later he called me.

"Sakura,"

His voice, _confident, firm, cold._

"Yes, Sasuke-kun?"

My voice, _scared, scared, scared._

_I'm sorry, don't leave me, **I'm** **sorry**. I take it all back._

_Please don't leave me._

"I'm sorry."

That was the last time I heard from him.

**You're unwanted. **

_"Why are you alive? Die. Die. **Die. **Die and give _her_ back to me."_

That day the darkness swallowed me whole. Slowly, silently, _dying_.

* * *

**I've wanted to write a dark fic for a while now. So I hope this could go well!**

**Btw, if it's unclear, this story IS ongoing so any confusions will be cleared don't worry! :]**

**Reviews are appreciated~**

**DD.**


	2. chapter one

**vo**id.

-**noun **; a feeling or condition of loneliness or deprivation.

* * *

**chapter one **–

It was spring when I first met him. He transferred to our school in the middle of the second semester. When he first walked into the classroom –head high in the air, eyes focused and determined; all the girls stopped breathing in shock. So did I.

He was gorgeous.

I sat on the front row and when our teacher introduced him, he was standing right in front of me. His eyes scanned the room carefully and I heard rustles as my female classmates rushed to look a lot more presentable before his eyes caught sight of them. I took the opportunity when our teacher distracted him, requesting him to write his name on the board before personally introducing himself.

I fixed my bowtie, and tied my tangled, messy hair into a ponytail –in seconds, I looked less tired and more _attractive_; shall we say.

I looked up and saw his name written neatly on the board. His handwriting was beautiful. Everything about him was _perfect_, and I knew I wasn't the only one thinking that.

_Uchiha Sasuke_.

"Hello," he spoke, sending shivers down my spine. I could feel myself blush as his voice echoed throughout the classroom when he spoke again. "My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I have no intention of being friends with any of you, so please do not talk to me."

Everyone was frozen, unsure of what to say. _I _didn't know what to say. My first impression of him that was positive seconds ago turned sour immediately.

"U-uh," our teacher stuttered, surprised and as confused as we were. "W-well then, I hope you'll get along with at least _one _of the students."

He eyed me, being the class representative, and very unfortunately, the one who stood out the most thanks to my flashy hair color, I was his first choice. He looked at Uchiha Sasuke then back to me, eyes wide and desperate.

I sighed. Adults are very unreliable.

"_Mommy, mommy where are you going?"_

I shook my head slightly and smiled. I stood up, and everyone looked at me, relieved.

"Hello, Uchiha-kun," I smiled. "My name is Haruno Sakura, I am the class representative and I will be your guide for this week. I will help you find your classes and I will answer all of your questions – they can be inquiries regarding the school and our lessons, or if you'd like to finally be introduced to your classmates I will be more than happy to help."

He looked at me, and I could see him narrow his eyes ever so slightly. Curiosity replaced by unfathomable darkness; _annoyed, cold, furious. _That caught me off guard, and my smile disappeared for a second.

"_Mommy, I will be a good girl, I promise. Don't go."_

"Interesting," he muttered, smiling. "I will be in your care then, Haruno-san. Please forgive me for that rude introduction, I look forward to this semester. This will be fun."

The tense atmosphere that lingered in the classroom was lifted almost immediately. I could hear sighs of relief coming from my classmates and my teacher looked at me proudly and thankfully.

_We can always rely on Haruno Sakura_, I could almost feel their thoughts. I smiled, ignoring the creeping discomfort.

He walked past me and I could see him grin from the corner of my eye. I shivered. That feeling of awe and admiration immediately turned to fear. That was when I knew he noticed when my smile disappeared.

I realized then that he agreed to it because it was _amusing_. I turned to look at him as he took a seat by the window. He looked at me and smiled a fake smile.

No, it wasn't fake. It was very much real. That was the smile of a predator, he _was_ going to have fun.

"Okay, that's that, welcome to Konoha High, Uchiha," our teacher smiled widely. "Okay then, turn to page 274."

I flipped the pages, and noticed both my hands trembling.

_I'm scared._

"_Mommy, where are you going?"_

"_I'll be back, Sakura."_

"_Mommy I'm scared."_

"_I'll be back, don't be scared."_

I'm scared, mommy.

**Please come back.**

* * *

**I promise all the confusions WILL be cleared. **

**You guys are saying the prologue is confusing, and I guess it's cause I have a manga format in my head**

**- so I'm writing while imagining how it'll be if it's drawn out. **

**I hope this chapter and the next and the next until the end will be a lot more comprehensive.**

**Oh, and this is an AU fic - shoutout to TheBloodyLoveOfSakuraHaruno**

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**DD.**


	3. chapter two

**vo**id.

-**noun **; a feeling or condition of loneliness or deprivation.

* * *

**chapter two **–

_Once upon a time, a girl with pink hair lived happily with her mommy and daddy. Every Sunday they took trips to the mall and had a lot of fun. When the girl was six, her daddy started coming home late. He would trip at the door, and he smelled like fruits. Her mommy would close the door to her room, but she could hear everything. She heard words she didn't understand: sex, cheating, unfaithful. _

_Her daddy changed ever since. Sometimes he'd come home, most of the time he was never there. He missed her sports festival and school drama, but she kept quiet. One day, maybe one day daddy would come home, she thought, if she kept being a good girl, one day daddy would come home, she believed. Daddy came home the day she turned seven. _

_He brought her gifts; new toys, new books, new pencils, new art supplies. She had always loved drawing. That day, she drew her family with smiles on their faces, and she was happy. It was a Sunday; they took a trip to the mall and had a lot of fun. She was happy._

_When her mommy and daddy kissed her forehead and bid her goodnight, she went to bed smiling. Daddy came home because she was a good girl, she thought, she was happy. _

_She woke up when the moon was still in the sky. She heard shouts and screams and plates shattering. Shaking, she walked downstairs, and stopped by the kitchen door. Her daddy was holding a phone in his hand, with someone calling out "Hello? Hello? Is everything okay, honey?" Her mommy was in the corner, shaking, she could tell she was crying. She made sure to walk around the broken plates. She was seven, and she was a smart girl._

_Both adults noticed her and they looked at her, broken. Her daddy knelt in front of her, and he looked at her straight in the eyes. She remembered his eyes, sad and heartbroken. "Sakura," he said, and she nodded, smiling. Be a good girl, she thought, be a good girl and daddy will stay. "I'm sorry."_

"_It's okay, daddy," she smiled, holding back her tears. Be a good girl, she thought. "Are you coming back?"_

_He looked at her, and he quickly wiped off his tears before she could see them. But she saw them, and she was sad – no, she was devastated. She was seven, but she understood. "I'm sorry, Sakura."_

"_It's okay, daddy," she kept smiling. "I love you."_

_He nodded, and he gave her a huge hug. Then he walked out the door without saying goodbye to her mommy. She looked at her mommy, who was still sobbing in the corner, leaning against the wall._

"_Mommy, it's okay," she said, carefully stepping around the broken plates. "Mommy I'm here, it's okay."_

_They hugged and she let her mommy cry throughout the night. Be a good girl, she thought, don't cry and be a good girl. You don't want mommy to leave too._

_Two years later, her and mommy moved into grandma's house. Grandma was old but she was strong and energetic. She loved grandma. When mommy wasn't home, grandma would let her sleep in her bed. Mommy started coming home less and less and she was scared._

"_Grandma, mommy is not going to leave, right?"_

"_No, dear," Grandma smiled, patting her head gently. "Mommy loves you very much, she will never leave you."_

_She was nine, but she was smart. She could hear the lie in grandma's voice but she smiled and nodded._

_Mommy came home that night and she was happy. For the first time in two months, she slept with mommy, and she felt safe. _

"_Do you love me?" she asked whilst nuzzled into mommy's bosom._

"_Sakura," _

"_Mommy, do you love me?"_

"_I'm sorry, Sakura."_

_She squeezed mommy, but she smiled. Be a good girl, she thought. Don't cry and be a good girl._

"_It's okay mommy. I love you."_

_Mommy did not wrap her hands around her at all that night, and she fell asleep cold and scared._

_The next morning as she made her way to the kitchen for breakfast, she saw mommy's red suitcase and orange purse waiting by the doorway. Mommy was sitting next to them, putting on her beautiful red high heels. _

"_Mommy, where are you going?"_

"_I'll be back, Sakura."_

"_Mommy I'm scared." _

_For the first time in two months, mommy patted her and she felt safe. She looked into mommy's eyes and she only saw darkness with no end._

"_I'll be back, don't be scared."_

"_Mebuki," she heard grandma calling from behind her._

"_I leave her to you, mom."_

_Grandma didn't say anything, but she knew. She was scared but she did nothing. She smiled and waved as mommy walked out the door. Mommy turned for a brief second, smiled, waved, and got into a car with a handsome man she had never seen before._

"_Let's go eat your breakfast, Sakura," grandma called._

"_Grandma, they're gone," she said, smiling._

"_Yes," grandma said but she couldn't read her voice. Something else, something much louder was blocking out what grandma was saying. _

_For the first time in three years, Sakura finally cried. She fell onto the floor and she cried three years' worth of tears, and more tears for the years to come. Grandma hurried to her side, hugged her and cried with her. She cried herself to sleep that day and didn't wake up until the next day._

_In the morning, she found her favorite breakfast ready on the table – pancakes with strawberry jam. She smiled. _

_Be a good girl,_

_she thought._

_Be a good girl, and maybe one day_

_daddy and mommy will come home. _

_Be a good girl._

* * *

**Well that was depressing I actually cried, welp.**

**I decided to put this chapter right after so that the confusion doesn't drag on.**

**Anyway, so everything after the prologue will be a flashback, just to make it clear!**

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**DD.**


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